Oh the time of resolutions soon to be broken. Instead of creating a resolution for 2011, how about just creating a general life list. Of course I want to be my goal weight. Of course I want to budget and make more money and yada yada. But I was thinking on the way home from my parents' house - I really want to learn to skate well. I would like to begin my lessons for learning a new language soon too.
I have attempted to create many life lists, but I always end up losing it or filling it up with stuff I don't really care that much about, but think that I should care about. Your life list is personal. Only put on it things you feel strongly about for yourself. Don't put down 'I will attend church regularly' if you don't feel the conviction. You'll never stick with it and you're already setting yourself up to fail. Put things, events, and experiences on this list that resonate within your own spirit. Something that seems so trivial like skating - for me - if I finally learned to skate really well - it would be a spiritual experience.
And please don't put on this list - a bunch of stuff about being healthier and losing weight. It's been done. By you, by everyone...to no victorious end. Perhaps instead of listing 'cut back on sweets' - say something like 'eat more mangos'. Some amazingly yummy fruit or veggie that you enjoy - some type of food that is so good for you - make a goal to eat more of that. Do you actually enjoy salads? Just put down that you are going to eat more salads. Stop concentrating on what you are going to cut out of your life. Study more on what you will add to it.
~Stop concentrating on what you are going to cut out of your life. Study more on what you will add to it.~
We have to break this insane cycle of torture. No more deprivation. Concentrate on the good and create your life list. Whether you believe in the divine or not - a life list or bucket list is just a collection of experiences you would like in your life before you pass from this world. And writing them down keeps them in the forefront of your conscious as well as your subconscious mind.
For those who think more along the spiritual lines - writing these down and feeling the excitement in your spirit as you write them - sends the request out to the universe and the universe is set in motion to respond with what you have asked for.
Be happy and filled with hope, cheer, and love. Be victorious! Happy Holidays to you and yours!
Happy Tuesday! The web address is now hosted! WOOOOO HOOOO!
Now hold back some excitement. I haven't actually put anything on it. You know how it goes - I'll make that lovely front page with the 'Under Construction' message in some form or another. And will be working on the rest of the content all secretly. I have gone through several design ops in my head, but when I actually get to it, it always changes a bit.
My next steps are
(1). Cleaning out my email accounts so they can all be forwarded to one account smoothly and easily
(2). Outlining my PHP texts and figuring how what code I need to use to make this vision work.
I realize I have been talking about figuring out this code for a while now. It isn't the code that is hard to figure out - it's the fact that this is all original IP (intellectual property) from me. So it's not like I can just use someone's model. I have to piece this stuff together and I don't know what that is going to entail just yet. I haven't gotten that far. But...I seem to be at that point now lol. No more saying 'I'm gonna'. It's do or die at this point ;-)
Now as for giving another more revealing hint as to what this site is all about...... The work I am doing currently is about our happiness. I feel that happiness is as complicated or as simple as we tend to make it at the time. Will this be a cure all? A website that will solve all life's complications? Of course not. But if it helps point people in the right direction...toward their goals and dreams - then it is life-changing. It is meaningful. And as the cliche goes, if it helps one person - then it's all worth it.
The most I can give right now is that this site addresses every aspect of our happiness by keeping things small, simple, and direct. At first glance, it may just seem like a web toy. And it is fun. It has to be...or you wouldn't be happy using it.
I realize it is still all a bit cryptic, but this is more than I have revealed before and many of my closest friends and relatives still do not know all the details.
I was always scared of starting anything and following through with my many plans and ideas because I knew there just had to be someone out there who either had already done it or would do it better than me. But this one...well I realized that even though there may be something out there that is similar...no one will do it just like me. Which is essentially, the only thing that makes us all useful - our differences.
Okay - enough babbling - I have to get back to work.
New schedule. New posts every Tuesday. Yeah I'm actually getting organized! Who'da thunk it.
As I said in the last post, my rpg's are taking over my life and even though I do not wish to give them up, I have found a happy medium where I only get on vent (vent = phone for the computer - to talk to other guildies) only when we raid (raid is a large party of guildies or fellow players united to take on a common goal in game). So I set status to busy and concentrate on the task or tasks at hand whether in game or out.
So far it has worked very well in game with my being able to concentrate solely on leveling and within a few hours I hit the new top level for the game.
So now I can concentrate on the out of game items. I finished my Christmas list and have done the majority of the shopping with just a few items to take care of here in the next couple days.
As for work on the site, in next week's post I will mention what the site is all about without revealing the mechanics so that it is unstealable, but less mysterious and more tangible to all reading this blog.
Someday I'll really work on advertising....but I figure this blog isn't that interesting right now. It is a working journal to keep myself sane and to let others know what I'm up to and why I haven't been available as much. I still love you all! ;-)
One would think having a husband that travels and no family to tend to, I'd have all the time in the world to work. But the loneliness and boredom of the day seeps in and I find solace in my escapes like computer games and endless lists of things to do (items that rarely get checked off - just rearranged and re-worded). The day slips away before I know it. And yet another day gone in the life of Erica Graham. One I'll never get back. December 2, 2010 will never take place again. And what have I done with this day?
I miss my family and friends and being in a town that is neither city nor country bugs the heck out of me. In the heart of a major city, there is hustle and bustle. You can walk to your destination or hail a cab. There is always something open and people around.
In the country you have fresh air and privacy. You can make whatever noise you want or mess for that matter as visitors are rare and neighbors are few. Scenery that is majestic and not made by man.
In a town that is in between - you fight traffic to get where you are going. Cabs don't drive down on cul-de-sacs very often and walking across an interstate to get where you want to go probably is not the best idea.
The houses are so close together in the suburbs, they may as well be apartments and yet the housing developers plan and build them to make you think you have your own yard. Oh you're free to do and build and be whatever you want. Until the homeowner's association steps in telling you what to do and how to do it. You can build a fence in your own yard - but it can't be over 4 feet high unless you have a pool. It must be white with one little pink doggy stenciled on the eastern most post. Okay I made that last part up but seriously I sit and wonder - who is paying for this fence anyway? If they're going to regulate it all - how about they chip in a bit? Least they could do.
I most definitely feel imprisoned. I am bored with human life. Thus my escape to a world filled with epic gear and elves. If only World of Warcraft were the norm. If only all you had to do was run back to your body if you accidentally fall off a cliff. You resurrect with half health of course, but a quick potion or bandage and you're good as new.
There are voices in my head...it is the people I play this game with. There is a software program called Ventrilo that allows my fellow WoW players to truly converse with each other. I seem to live my life over such devices as of late. Phone calls, vent, toon emotes - all the same. I can't decide if that's a bad thing or not. Oh many who have never played would say its very bad and not healthy. But it cuts down on the small talk and awkwardness of meeting in person. I hate small talk. How many answers are there to how are you doing and what have you been up to? Next time I'm going to tell them I killed 50 whelplings in 15 seconds and my last name is now Jenkins.
As one person said in 'trade chat' in the middle of a crowded city: "Girlfriend? Who needs a girlfriend? Girlfriends come and go, but epic gear binds on equip." Oh wait...that probably wasn't as funny to nonplayers. I forget about civilians sometimes. This game will get into your soul and then you are bound to it - both in speech and dreams.
When I start to spin around as I jump and thrust my hand forward expecting arcane missiles to shoot out, I'll know it is time to seek serious help.
Til then, you can find me on WoW. And I wrote all that to say this: Cataclysm, the new expansion is coming out in less than a week. This sets the game world on a tizzy as people prep their characters to take on the new content. If you watch that vid - be not afraid. My guild and I are on top of it - we'll kill Deathwing and save the world....of warcraft. I'm setting aside the PHP book for a few days. It's my own vacation because at this point - holidays don't count. They are so hectic - they feel like work now. The baking, the decorating, the traveling, the shopping...bleck. Family face time is definitely worth it - but still hectic.
I am very happy things are falling into place with every project I currently have going.
There are just those moments I begin to doubt or want things done a little faster and a lot better. And while those things are not bad to want, breaks and vacations can do a world of good. As long as I stick to my schedule after this week's vacation - everything is still smooth sailing.
During this learning and discovery period, I am looking to take on some freelance writing projects. Time to build that portfolio, kids!
My strength is inspirational and instructional writing. I thought of breaking into the technical writing field - writing all those stereo instruction pamphlets. It sounds really boring and I'm sure it does get a little mundane, but in thise case the paycheck would more than make up for a yawn here and there.
According to Payscale, the average salary for a technical writer is around $40,000 to $70,000.
Needless to say it is time to sit down and write up a portfolio that spans the wide array of possible fields, concentrating most of my attention on the style that makes me happy.
As for the site progress....holidays are slowing me up a bit. I did, however, read an article over Thanksgiving that spoke of exactly what my site is about and how these things bring happiness.
I hope to reveal more of what the site is to everyone very soon.
I hope everyone had a very happy Thanksgiving! I find myself very tired and ready for another nap.
Work on the website is going well. Not a whole lot to report. I will be writing another article soon, but wanted to write a quick post wishing you all well. :-)
Who doesn't need to brush up on a second language? It is on many life lists out there. So why not get started...especially because...it's free. My husband mentioned this site to me and it is an excellent business tool. Not only for those who do business overseas or travel for fun - but those sticking around in their own country will undoubtedly find themselves in a situation where they would benefit from Spanish or French or English lessons beyond those of high school.
The more we close the gap on our differences in the world and remove barriers such as language - we can begin to understand each other, release prejudices, and obliterate ignorance. Oh what a wonderful world that will be.
I keep having to remind myself that this is a journal to show the process of getting this project up and running and not just an 'interesting articles' blog. I figure no one wants to read the ups and downs...at least they won't until it's finished and becomes a huge success ha ha. But regardless, I need the therapeutic activity and reconnect that writing this blog brings me.
So right now I'm debating on what I want to program my website in. I have always used Frontpage and html. But I feel it is time to open up to PHP, MySQL, and possibly using different web editing programs. This is why I actually chose to make it a year before I opened the site - I could have slapped together a site in no time, but this needs to be professional and I have to expand my knowledge on how to do that. My husband bought me A Brain-Friendly Guide Head First PHP & MySQL - hopefully this giant book will limit those moments of having to close my eyes and lay my head in my hands making sense of what I just read, translating everything to code.
Programming is like a big fun puzzle that everyone can do, but most people won't or do not want to. Which makes it all the more appealing! Programming mechanical gizmos and creating a website is slightly different considering what I put into my coding won't have to move mechanisms 'in real life' it just has to function on the site itself...and yet somehow it can be just as frustrating and time consuming. Especially since I'm alone in this. I have clued very few people as to what the site is truly about.
The first thing I need to learn is how to call up a random item from a pre-fabbed list. Then it'll be time to expand on that knowledge to make it functionally fabulous...pray for me.
Ha ha.
And by the way, I now have officially less than a year to get this puppy hoppin'. Here we go...
Love & Gratitude, Erica Nicole
P.S. If any of my former English teachers and writing teachers read this - forgive the sentence fragments and such! Feel free to print a copy out and send it to me with red marks. I love you all!
A few years ago I started a candle company. I had a chance to sell said company and I did not - even though I knew the company was going nowhere for me as I had lost my passion for it early on. I had passion for the business side and the ideas that made the company unique, but not for making the dang things. I didn't really recognize myself as an entrepreneur and this lost opportunity was my first failure in that world. Regret? Sure. But it also excites me - makes me feel like one of the big girls or boys in the business world. Excitement from failure? Yeah - who'da thunk it.
Here are some tools I enjoy and my short descriptions of them - visit the
sites for more thorough information:
The Secret Memory Game - http://thesecret.tv/memory-game.html
Yes we all know The Secret is marketed out the wazoo and this is more of the same, but it's a fun throwback to the childhood game with great advice to go along with it.
Dream Moods Dictionary - http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/
Ever have a dream that seems to be about nothing, but you can't get it out of your head? This is a great tool to possibly figure out what's going on.
Stumble Upon - http://www.stumbleupon.com
This site is amazing. You create an account, go through a checklist of interests - checking off your faves, then download a toolbar. Anytime you are bored, need a break, or need some inspiration you can click the 'stumble' button on the toolbar and you'll find sites you never knew existed. Everything from online games to marketing is listed. You also get to tell the site if you liked where it took you - so essentially it learns your interests even more. I recommend this to everyone. It's pretty great.
Astrology Insight - http://www.astrology-insight.com/astrologyinformation.htm
Okay so don't freak out if you don't believe in this stuff. Most people - whether they believe or not - read their horoscopes for the fun of it. This is a good site and although I rarely check my horoscope - I love the personality descriptions. This site has some of the best. To get yours - once you click on the site, you will see a pale yellow box to the left - click on your sign and voila. This site isn't well organized, but content is key.
Okay that's it for now, but I hope someday soon I'll be adding my own site to this little list.
This is a simple tidbit I wanted to mention - by no means a literary work of genius - but if you run a website - it is a vital piece of information to know.
The tools that I want to introduce on my website would definitely work well as a mobile site. Now days, if you have a website, you need to have a mobile site to go with it. People are accessing the internet more from their mobile devices than desktops and even laptop computers.
It's interesting to know that if you don't have a specific mobile site - people using these devices are directed to your normal site - which means lots of scrolling and long load times and ultimately people clicking off your site to find a better alternative i.e. your competition - which is definitely just a click away.
So be ahead of the competition and work on finding how to create and host a mobile site.
I'll be going through this process myself very soon and will do more extensive research, but in the mean time if anyone has any experience or advice on this - feel free to share. I would greatly appreciate the input.
Why should Small Goalz exist? Why am I moving forward with this? Why do I believe in this so much?
I was lost.
After rifling through so many ideas of what my future career should be - what I was meant to do with my life...
I got depressed. When I started thinking I'll never be who or what I want to be...I'll never look the way I want. Why even try?
The funny part of it was that I did keep trying - to find myself, my profitable talents, my likes and dislikes. It felt like I kept trying in vain. I kept delving into self help books. I lapped up any meaningful quote or speech. I wanted to hear everything anyone who had started with nothing but rose to success had on their minds. All the while I let everything else in my life falter.
I was getting worse and worse at social skills - the few that I did have. I became a recluse. The 'pretty' that I worked for after graduating high school was going away - the figure, the fitness...I was after something a little deeper all the while getting more and more depressed because I couldn't have it all at once. Why couldn't I keep my looks while going on a significantly personal journey toward fulfillment? I just didn't see how I could do this and that and be here and there all at once...
It was like my mind was going 90 to nothing, but my outward features and personality didn't match what was in my head - my expressions were not my own - they were on auto-pilot. I dare to say, it was kind of what I think an autistic person is like. The house (mind) is definitely a rockin' but the outside world is not invited. The difference was, I could still put on a show on the outside that satisfied the public, my friends, and family enough so that they weren't quite ready to commit me.
But I did find what I was meant to do and I'm sure by just skipping to this point - the happy ending, it feels like I'm glossing over a significant piece of my journey - the hardships and lessons that got me to this moment. Well I definitely am taking a more direct course and summarizing a bit as to not write a whole novel here. I don't mean to cheat anyone out of the juicy details - but they'll come out as this blog continues and the site takes shape.
The point is - that journey - those thoughts - those lessons...all of it showed me step by step while I was searching that 1.) I may have eventually found myself, but I didn't do it alone. and 2.) Because this process is so exhaustive and emotionally charged - I let other important aspects of my life fly out the window.
I don't believe I am damaged beyond repair - at least not anymore. Through the help of some amazing people and resources in my life - I am building back those things I lost during the time of self-discovery - my fitness and general health being the most obvious.
I typed all of that above - to get to this:
This site I am creating comes from what I needed during that process. I needed it, but it wasn't out there - believe me, I searched for it. Even if someday something similar pops up - it can never be the same - this is all from my mind. Of course if it's a direct copy I'm sure there will be lawsuits involved ha ha.
I know there are people out there just like me and I know there will be more of them. The housewives who feel like they've given up their dreams, careers, and social lives for the lives of their families (when most of the time our families just want to see us be happy - but that doesn't stop the negative self-talk). The ADHD teens and adults who feel lazy and stupid, but who definitely are not. The depressed people who feel like getting out of bed is a chore. And any combination of those and more.
If you could have a free tool to bring a spark to your day and make you productive - would you want it? Would you use it?
Hopefully by October 31, 2011, if all goes well - you'll have it. And so far - things are going well. Believe me - I'd love to get it out there right now. For those out there hurting at this moment or just bored out of their minds, frustrated and overwhelmed - feel free to contact me and I'll let you in on some of the things that helped me. You can also read this blog - the older posts too - I mention some of the things I do to make things easier.
As most of us Secret watchers/readers know - it isn't good to announce to everyone that you're sick as you are bound somewhat by the thoughts and words you put out in the world. But this is the last time I will post about it. I am definitely not feeling well.
That said - I still have to get some work done tomorrow. The great part about working for yourself - I get to decide what kind of work I'll be doing.
During our trip to San Francisco, I picked up some really great magazines at the airports. Two issues of Entrepreneur and one Harper's. They have amazing information in them and I overwhelmingly fell head over heels in love with Entrepreneur magazine so as soon as we got home, I subscribed. The subscription price was so inexpensive for the amount of information you get. It's less than a dollar an issue. Between the magazine itself, the magazine's website, and their facebook page - I have my day filled with learning.
If I can't be a rock tomorrow - I'll be a sponge.
Tomorrow I'm finishing Freakonomics - if I don't finish it tonight. And I'll be spending time absorbing all information on Entrepreneur mag's sites. What's amazing about their facebook page is - they ask questions and all the entrepreneurs in various fields and locations give their opinions and wisdom on important subjects. Real feedback in real time - love it!
I would say Harper's isn't a must have for business - it's just interesting reads, but Entrepreneur - how many times can I say how amazing it is lol. I'm loving Freakonomics as well. I can't wait to get into SuperFreakonomics, but have many other books to read before then - I still haven't finished Stephen Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I know - I'm a bad girl ha ha.
Seriously though - if you're starting a craft business or planning to take over a huge company or anything in between - order this magazine!!!
There. Think my blog will go up in search results?
In addition to the little (but important) things such as hosting information, schedules, keeping up with various blogs and profiles, some minor networking, and reading business related material...I am now concentrating on marketing.
The tricky thing is - I'm not actually marketing Small Goalz, but this blog that is about starting Small Goalz.
*Sigh*
The problem - how do you know a blog is ready? It's a little scary trying to get the world interested in a blog about an idea. Will they try to steal it? Will they get sick of it before it even begins?
I know the avenues of marketing, but where do I begin? If you catch me in a daydream lately I'm thinking of viral stunts, ad copy, business plans, and defending my blog against criticism (which oddly enough these criticisms adopt the faces of people from my life - you know those people in your life you want to show a thing or two and that you're 100 percent sure are going to be the first ones to rip you apart the first chance they get).
The thing is - I'm not afraid of criticism - in fact I live for it - a little too much maybe. I tend to create scenarios that put people in situations where they have to fess up. Do you love it or hate it?! Because it's always been black and white with me, baby. No gray! If you don't love me, you hate me. I can deal with the hate, but I cannot deal with someone pretending.
But the world isn't like that. There are so many gray areas and learning to thrive in the gray has been my greatest challenge with my own personality and emotions.
So as I continue through this marketing process, I am seeing the 'views' of my blog shoot up quickly and on a daily basis - yet I see only a few loyal followers - whom I appreciate more than words can say - and a scant amount of comments.
I immediately begin the inner tirade of what could I have said to spark more interest, is there anything offensive in my post, should I have put more pictures in the blog to engage and grab attention?
But here's the reality: Asking myself those questions isn't a bad thing - it only sparks improvement. Blogs also tend to be somewhat specialized. Even if this site that I am creating goes after a broad array of people, this blog won't be interesting to anyone except those who have similar feelings as I do.
Not everyone is a customer or a reader and that's okay. And don't mistake that comment for complacency. I would advertise my blog to everyone and give them the opportunity to take a gander, but I cannot put everyone into the category of LOVE or HATE. There is the I DON'T LIKE TO READ, BUT IF I DID I'D READ YOUR BLOG group, there's the I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE WRITING group, there's the WHAT YOU WRITE DOES NOT PERTAIN TO ME SO WHY SHOULD I BE INTERESTED group, and so many other gray areas. Not everyone is a customer or a reader and that's okay.
But even so, you could follow or click a link for god's sake. Kidding, kidding. Learn to laugh :-P
Love & Gratitude, Erica Nicole
P.S. I'd love to hear from anyone who has been successful in their marketing endeavors - what worked and what didn't? : )
I am playing around with a few options so the look of the blog may change a few more times. I haven't messed around with code in a long time and I'm out of practice, but this will be good preparation for adding content to the site. It's kinda fun once you get going, but code is kinda like a magic eye picture. You first look over it and it just seems like a bunch of letters and numbers but cross your eyes a bit, stand on your head, and squint and the formulas come to life.
Well - here it is. I went through sooo many options with this puppy. I've got all the files saved in photoshop and will probably never let them go because you can literally see the process I went through to get it all. At one point I got frustrated and created this multi-colored craziness out of sheer frustration and silliness. It's actually kinda cute but not the right feel for the site.
Even though I haven't revealed what exactly the site's function is - you can kinda guess with the title and logo.
Love & Gratitude,
Erica Nicole
P.S. There were many other similar ones to the final product, this is the only one I went in a totally different direction with, rebelling out of my frustration trying to get the perfect logo going. I'm not sure what is more frustrating doing graphic design for others or yourself.
I've been kinda paralyzed in my own thoughts and emotions lately. It wasn't enough that I wanted to get back to feeling better. I just couldn't do it on my own.
So I sat quietly - some would call this a kind of meditation.
I believe everyone is connected. And whatever we feel, we project that energy to the rest of the people we are connected to. So if you are continually feeling drained and tired, negative and irrational - you are putting that out to all of us.
But if you walk around in a positive attitude such as joy, thankfulness, with a comedic spirit, in a working mind, with determination, etc - you are projecting this out to to all of us.
So if you want the world to be a better place - begin with yourself. A simple change in thought and attitude can do wonders and even better yet - purposely projecting that to others in your mind - for them to be happy and have a good day today and then even further - smiling at everyone or at least making them feel a little better about their day - it becomes contagious and pretty soon you've changed a few people for the day.
It wasn't enough that I wanted to change my thoughts and emotions for me today, but as I sat here and thought I am poisoning our world with these thoughts right now - I finally changed them a lot easier than I had anticipated.
: ) I love each and every one of you who read this blog. May you be blessed beyond anything you've imagined today. : ) SMILE : ) : ) : )
Well I went shopping for curtains for the office - found some amazing ones and luckily they were on sale - I mean super sale - which also meant they were back ordered. I won't be getting my beauties til November 17th!! Oh well - the sheet doesn't look that bad - does it? (see said sheet here)
The projects for tomorrow - (it's the first day of work in the 'new' office) * Marketing for my blog/sSo far I've just shared the blog with a few family members and friends via facebook. It's time to get the ball rolling and send it out to the world.
* Schedules and time managementI actually had an amazing class on this during my medical transcriptionist program and I kept all my notes. It's not as boring as it sounds. I'll be creating a schedule and basically taking the class again through all the documentation I have on it with some extra reading on the side.
* Logo RevealedI have one little tweak I want to make to the graphic - the legal junk. But after that I can post it up and I can't wait to start using it! I hope to actually have this done before marketing the blogs.
* Business Plan and Mission StatementAs I want to be very thorough, I'm guessing this will take a few days and will be constantly revised throughout this year while the process is underway. I will probably work on one section a day.
As for anything going on outside of the office...I'm reading Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass on my new kindle and I'll be starting Freakonomics (in paperback) tomorrow as well. Add in the normal household chores.....and I really want to go to the Halloween store. We have our same Halloween decorations up from last year and I'd like to expand on them a bit.
The lanterns light up a bit, but it just needs something - don't you think? I don't want to get gaudy though so if I can't find something good - it can wait til next year - no biggie. It'll be time to worry about Christmas decorations soon anyway - yikes!
Well that's all I've got. G'day or evening or night or whatever....xoxo
Do you ever have that feeling that you've lost that loving feeling?
Today has been a particularly trying day. I have come down with a doozy of a cold. Bad moods are running rampant. It's just one of those days I suppose. So glad it's almost over, but I'm going to try to turn my frown upside down before midnight.
There are a few things I do to change my mindset. One is writing to a mentor and friend of mine. Secondly I usually watch something funny or uplifting - sometimes a Kandee Johnson youtube vid or something similar.
I love my business books too. They help me get in the right mood for success - all disgustingly filled with ways to stay positive and be an optimist and get more determined.
I don't normally cry, but this day may call for it. I had all these plans today. Lovingly written out in notepad on this computer. There they sit - incomplete and glaring at me - none checked off.
I'm so tired, yet I can't sleep - head racing, but in a fog. Okay time to find something funny on tv while I look up some inspiring things on the net.
Love & Gratitude, Erica Nicole
Update: Thank god for Kandee and when I realized I still hadn't turned the tv to something funny - I look up and Blues Brothers was on lol - with all these resources - I got my peace and smiles before midnight.
Dear....God...please help me to never ever accumulate this much junk again!!!
Here are the excuses:
I've moved 4 times in 4 years and even though I did get rid of a lot of stuff each time, apparently I didn't get rid of enough. So I finally decided I'd go through each room and get them all organized in such a way they would be easier to clean and just contain less needless junk. But where does all that needless junk go? It goes to the last room I tackle - my office...and it goes there to be fruitful and multiply.
I created a mountain of the madness and today I finally conquered that mountain.
The office is clean. There are a few things I still have to get for it, but behold the cleanliness:
We still need to get new office chairs and eventually we'll get John a real desk instead of this table - but it works for now.
And no - those aren't his ribbons - this is the office/craft/wrapping room and oh so much more.
I freakin love my desk. It has that traditional look, but is still a computer desk with lots of room and no wasted space. And yeah - no curtain yet. The bright white sheet looks amazing though lol. You would be surprised how hard it is to find bright white blackout curtain panels. I mean isn't white a common color - uh I mean non color or abundance of color...whatever. And what is that growing on my desk?
Yeah that's right - I totally found this plant that produces electronics.
So cute - I love it! My camera and phone's new home. Yep - it's a charging station. And just when I thought I couldn't get any more nerdy...had to put my little Ikea light over the top so the grass can get its photosynthesis on.
As you can see it looks pretty bare (but clean!) so as I get shipments in and get some things completed, I will update this blog with photos of the progress. Such as the new chairs, the new gadgets, the artwork, dry erase board etc etc.
But I couldn't end the blog without mentioning this awesome thing:
The picture I took of mine turned out too blurry, but here it is. This is a wrapping paper holder. I outgrew the one I had. I don't put it over the door - it's in the closet. This one holds a lot of paper neatly and see that little pouch situation at the bottom? Yeah that detaches. So your ribbons and scissors and tape can go with you wherever. I'm also thinking about putting my cards in there. Love love love it!!!
Love & Gratitude, Erica Nicole
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Also - in a previous post I had discussed creating a new blog about weight loss after my office was clean. It is in the works and I will update this post with the link as soon as I have it. I'm settling into this office and getting a schedule worked out which will include an exercise program. It is definitely on the way!
Update:
This chair just arrived for the office
I looove it so far. It is so much more comfortable than you'd think. The backrest isn't meant to really be leaned against all the time - the ball sits you straight up.
The claims are that it "relieves stress on the spine, helps prevent back discomfort and repetitive motion disorders, helps prevent health issues related to poor posture, illustrates non-impact strengthening exercises and stretching, keeps you active, even on busy work days."
Yesterday I was so productive - after having a red bull in the morning...I was zoomin all over checking everything off my 'to do' list. Now I'm just sitting here waiting for a package to arrive. I've played some World of Warcraft for most of the day so far (working on my mage - holla if you're excited about Cataclysm around the corner!).
To get out of the slump - I start making a 'to do' list and start feeling like this kid looks:
This is a huge drawback of working at home. So many distractions - cats and laundry and errands and no one believing you if you say you have to work because they think you sit at home and do nothing lol. If I had a little commute to work, the washer and dryer would be a little harder to reach and nothing but work could be on my mind at the moment.
At this point, I do have the logo, the website, a whole ton of information at the ready, and everything else...is in my head. I have written various thoughts down, but no real work beyond that has taken place on the site. The first day of real work is slated to start when I have my office clean. It is very close.
I have a handful of things that need doing and I find myself truly not wanting to do them. After much start and stop, I had to take a step back and reflect on why I am having a 'blockage' of sorts. Why am I making this an obstacle when it really isn't?
Suddenly, at what could be the beginning of it all, instead of rushing to get everything done so I can get a move on - I find myself in my baggiest and comfiest of pj's, thinking of ordering a pizza because I'd rather not get dressed and leave the house today.
Logic: So if I'm looking for ways to be more comfortable, that must mean I am counteracting something very uncomfortable. Or maybe my head is not where it needs to be for the first steps to take place.
I have been struggling with needing vs. not needing approval. In today's 'it's all about me' society - it feels like a tug of war. On one side me, the other - the world. Do I include others on the journey to the top? Do I let them see my hardships and do I admit my failures? Or do I dress for success and pretend everything is perfect - not to be misleading, but to be optimistic? You know - that whole dress for the job two levels above the one that you want thing?
The problem is - if people see you are doing well, they will point their attention toward those less fortunate who actually happen to be equal in fortune to you. For lack of a better phrase - 'the squeaky wheel gets the grease'. It seems we like people on one side of the spectrum or the other. Rich or poor. Strong or weak. Mediocrity is not rewarded.
So do I become proud and independent to be labeled by 'haters' as pompous and arrogant or do I become giggly and humble to be seen as weak and unconcerned?
Ideally I'd like to be somewhere in the middle. I see myself as somewhere in the middle. Accessible and down to earth in a down-to-business kind of way. But the thing is, haters are gonna hate. Everyone needs to be an authority on something and usually the perfect opportunity for these vultures (these vultures being humans) is a spot behind a computer screen with a pseudo name and a bad attitude.
I'm taking a page from Pollyanna and playing the glad game today. I'm taking a page from Alice and believing six impossible things today. I'm taking a page from Kandee and knowing that all the manure in my life will produce pretty flowers soon and that a broken mirror produces more shimmers. I'm taking a page from Frank and knowing that the best is yet to come. Takin a page from Eminem because I'm not afraid. And finally...I'm taking a page from Jay-Z and gettin that dirt off my shoulder today. <----clicky that link if you don't know what it means.
Those of you who are sensitive - EXPLICIT LYRICS - Don't click play if you will get offended.
Kandee Johnson's going to be on tv. She's been all over the web and in fashion magazines and now she'll be a guest judge on the Oxygen channel's Hair Battle Spectacular tonight (9 central time)!
If you haven't heard of her - read about her on one of my past blogs: Personal Empires (she also commented on that blog - ha ha - love her).
1. My Messy Office
2. Revealing the Logo
3. I <3 Graphic Design
4. Inspirations
5. Technical Difficulties
These are some I'm working on and will be posted very soon. As always the support on this blog makes me feel loved and appreciated in this work. When you put your heart out there - your goals and dreams for others to see and it is accepted warmly - that kind of support is not easily forgotten. I know I've been somewhat cryptic with the actual idea for the website, but there will probably never be a blog in which I reveal the entire thing at once until it is finished.
This blog is actually more about the process anyway. It's more about the frustrations and excitement one experiences in getting something like this together. It's a lot of fun and definitely will help me stick to my goal date of October 31, 2011. And it was brought to my attention that the clock widget on the right column of this blog does not work well in firefox. I'll be looking out for one that works with both IE and Firefox.
Again, thank you for the emails, the comments, and for following. It means the world ;-)
Well the Silicon Valley portion of the trip was summed up in the previous posts so let's skip right to San Fran. We started out in the Mission District - and I'll admit - I was freaked out. There were some interesting characters there, lots of graffiti, and we walked by a couple people talking about someone who was in 'the wrong place at the wrong time'.
We were trying to get our donut from Dynamo Donuts as previously discussed in the last post. But when we got there - they were out! Boo!
So onward to the Golden Gate Bridge. We get there and this is what we see...
amazing. This is where they send the people in CA to die...they don't come out the other side...I checked.
So we go to the Buena Vista to get an Irish Coffee, hoping this stop turns out a little better than the last couple.
Oh it did...it did. John had a couple Irish coffees. I had a couple sips - very good - now back to my Sprite.
This place was the first to serve Irish Coffee in America. You can get the recipe here. Of course there's more to it - the perfect ingredients, but I imagine you can get pretty close.
We also had fresh crab dishes that were just yummy. I got presents for the fam near Alcatraz and Fisherman's Wharf. The city was amazing in this area. The hills and buildings and lights - gorgeous!
So after driving around exploring a bit, we got back to our hotel and crashed.
This hotel was better than the last. Both were great and both were Hyatts, but this one was so airy and it didn't hurt the view was of the bay.
I don't think I put a link to the actual site for the first hotel so here's the Silicon Valley Hyatt and for the San Francisco Hyatt. Have to give credit where credit is due. But kept it in tiny type so it wouldn't look like an advertisement ha ha. Both are highly recommended!
The next morning, someone brought me this:
Woo hoo - finally!
I also tried the Chocolate Rose and hubby tried Spiced Chocolate, but the star was the Maple Glazed Bacon Apple. It tastes like high quality perfect bacon on sweet sweet bread with a hint of apple and maple syrup.
Then off to the airport we went. San Francisco airport - plane delayed - finally on, a stop in San Diego, then on to Pheonix. It was HOT in Pheonix. We came from 68 degree weather and walked into 108 degree oven. Pheonix airport is where I had a hot dog I shouldn't have and for punishment I dropped some on my shirt. So yay - I get to go through the airport with a stain. No fears - we'll be on the plane then into the car quicker than you know it. Ha! Wishful thinking! The flight was fine until we got about 30 minutes from St. Louis. Then we saw the storms. This is the video we took of us flying above the lightning filled chaos.
This was the weirdest landing I had experienced. Side to side, this way, then that. Didn't even hear the landing gear open.
After that, when we were getting ready to pull in, they wouldn't let us because of the lightning. About 5 minutes passed and we pulled in. Not bad. We make our way to baggage claim and nothing's coming. For 10 minutes we sat there...15 minutes....announcement: "Due to lightning we cannot allow our crew to get baggage - we apologize for the inconvenience...if you'd like to leave, let us know and we will lock your bags up and you can come and get them tomorrow."
Four to six planefulls were waiting for their bags. Various camping settlements broke out. Thankfully a breakthrough two hours later. We get our bags and get a move on through the storm. Rain went away as we got closer to home, but we saw this little truck at the power station. Then watched as the dark houses went by...and no streetlights...awesome...no garage door opener....no power. St. Louis says welcome home in such a weird way.
So after we got home about 30 minutes later we had power again.
Today we are recovering from a ton of travel and good times.
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As always, throughout the trip, I analyzed every business - from the guy who prints the graphics in the kiosks to the plastic in the air masks on the plane. How did these companies come to be, how did these employees get here? What did the owners start with? How many failures did they have on the way? What kind of business do they do in this location and would it serve them to re-locate or expand?
I bought a Harper's in the airport and was reading Freud's theories and the unhappiness in America and I couldn't help but think of how many times I think 'if I just had my business up and running like these people - I'd be happy'. But it's that same old thing...if I had this business...if I were this weight...if I had this, if I was that...the key, is to find happiness now - wherever you are, be happy with what you have - Like What You Are Doing Now!
People are fascinating creatures and the things we have accomplished in this world are astounding. We look at the rich and famous as some kind of myth or superhero, but the truth is we are all the same. Every one of us has the same basic needs and functions. All the people we look up to started in the same place we did. Born naked into the world. Yes, some have a proverbial silver spoon, but whether it was their grandfather or his grandfather - someone started out having a lot less and wanted to be the one who made the difference and kept their determination and knew they would be successful....some way...somehow - they would realize their dreams.
LA, San Francisco, New York City, Chicago, Minneapolis, St. Louis, and any other major cities I've experienced - do have very different energies and yet it all comes back to the same basic feeling. First - the need to survive, then the need to succeed and make a mark in the world, hopefully changing it for the better. Love it!
Okay forgive...I am still in such a head fog lol. But that was the quick summation of our trip and I am spent. Time for some at home recovery today, a lot of laundry, and a little nap.
Love and Gratitude, Erica Nicole
P.S. My surprise pics I wanted really badly (mentioned in a previous post) was the various scenes in Full House - yeah Imma big dork - shhhh. But it didn't happen. Not enough time. So here's a video of the opening theme - hope it makes up for it ha ha.
Btw - this is just a vid for the song - someone else's vid from youtube ;-) Sing along time.
I wanted to go to Alcatraz, but it's at least a 4 hour situation and reservations were recommended. I want to see it, but don't know if I want to spend four hours looking at the place where people were miserable when we don't have much time. If nothing else it would have been cool to see it since movies have been filmed about it...The Rock - good flick.
Anywho...we went to two amazing places yesterday. I mean we're in Silicon Valley - there's not much else to do besides going and annoying the people at big companies.
And by the way - as I see myself in these pictures I am sorely reminded that I am no longer a size 6. That will be addressed very soon - but one goal at a time. Once we get back - office clean first, then time for some serious attention to exercise and such.
Google was massive. It's like they have a building for everyone. This was one of the many signs at the google campus. The cutest part of seeing it was the google colored bikes people were riding. Most people know by now that Google is one of the best places to work. I'll find one of the many articles about it and link it here. Look at this bike - they were all over the place!
As nerdy as they look - I still want one lol.
We did see Microsoft and I know Apple is around here somewhere but those weren't the priorities for the moment. Google was one and Facebook the other. That's right..I now have a picture with the Facebook sign for my Facebook profile page. Giggity.
Yeah I was gonna do something cute here...but people were watching and so I just leaned on the cement - now it looks like I'm using the potty behind the sign or something. Whatever. We got the pic - all that matters.
So now we're off to San Francisco in a few hours. One of my favorite tv shows of all time is The Best Thing I Ever Ate. I don't know why I torture myself with it because very few things from St. Louis ever end up on that show. But we are in friggin Cali now and we're gonna have some things. Dynamo Donuts...look at the donut menu. I'm not even a donut fan, but I want to try about every single one of these. We may be in a sugar coma before we return.
The two I'm definitely going to try: Chocolate Rose and the Maple Glazed Bacon Apple which was the only one featured on the Food Network.
Other than that - pics of us at the Golden Gate Bridge and I'm hoping in front of a certain house only a geek like me would love - not a techy geek - just a geek...possibly even go as far as saying a dork like me would love...I won't spoil the surprise right now. Hopefully I'll be writing later tonight or tomorrow morning. We'll see how the day goes.
Not really. But again - stuck in my head - so voila the new title.
Hello from very sunny California! I can't even take a picture of the view from our hotel room at the moment because the sun is blinding. The picture above is as we were descending to LAX.
I am so tired. I feel the energy returning though. I just had some breakfast. Continental breakfast can be yummy - it's free and I was hungry...perfect. Now put me in a shower and I'll be good to go.
I'm not a big fan of flying - getting to our destination quickly - yes. Being cramped on a small loud plane - no thanks.
I'm normally not a germophobe, but an airport brings it out in me and I forgot my hand sanitizer and my vitamins. I'll be going to the store very soon!
Traffic is insane, but I'm sure this is normal for the natives. It's flowing nicely - there's just a TON of it. We're near San Jose at the moment. We'll be heading back to San Francisco tomorrow. I know as I take pictures of me by the Golden Gate Bridge, I'll be singing the theme to Full House. I can't help it. Child of the early 90's here.
This Hyatt is pretty nice. This is the room we're staying in.
Lobby:
Just as the reviews said - very clean. It smelled nice right when we stepped in from the parking lot.
I can hear the guy in the next room having a very loud phone conversation - I haven't figured out if he's from a different country or he's Sylvester Stalone. It's so weird - it's like a cross between a thick Louisiana and New York accent. But anyway - other than that guy - it's really quiet - we have adjoining rooms with Sylvester so that's one reason why I can hear him.
From this trip I may try to compile an energies blog - all of the major cities I've been in have different work energies about them. I love them all because there is something to learn from all of them. I'd still like to feel the energy of Las Vegas and Anchorage and Orlando and Austin as well. Traveling while starting this business is going to be helpful, I'm sure. I would not be able to travel near as much if it weren't for my husband. Going to LA or NYC may seem so cliche, but seriously their energies are inspiring. I'd love to go to Tokyo, Japan as well. Talk about a working energy! I bet it's amazing!
I'll also be working a couple blogs on some upcoming things for the site - such as making it mobile. There are several things that came to me on the 4 hour plane ride from St. Louis to LA.
Well I'm still in a fog and probably not making much sense so I'll write again tomorrow.
Love and Gratitude, Erica Nicole
Update: View from our hotel room - the sun moved over a bit for me:
- hopefully this giant book will limit those moments of having to close my eyes and lay my head in my hands making sense of what I just read, translating everything to code. 
and one 
. They have amazing information in them and I overwhelmingly fell head over heels in love with Entrepreneur magazine so as soon as we got home, I subscribed. The subscription price was so inexpensive for the amount of information you get. It's less than a dollar an issue. Between the magazine itself, the magazine's website, and their facebook page - I have my day filled with learning. 
- if I don't finish it tonight. And I'll be spending time absorbing all information on Entrepreneur mag's sites. What's amazing about their facebook page is - they ask questions and all the entrepreneurs in various fields and locations give their opinions and wisdom on important subjects. Real feedback in real time - love it!
, but have many other books to read before then - I still haven't finished Stephen Covey's 
. I know - I'm a bad girl ha ha. 
on my new 
and I'll be starting 
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