Happy Holidays!

Oh the time of resolutions soon to be broken.  Instead of creating a resolution for 2011, how about just creating a general life list.  Of course I want to be my goal weight.  Of course I want to budget and make more money and yada yada.  But I was thinking on the way home from my parents' house - I really want to learn to skate well.  I would like to begin my lessons for learning a new language soon too.

I have attempted to create many life lists, but I always end up losing it or filling it up with stuff I don't really care that much about, but think that I should care about.  Your life list is personal.  Only put on it things you feel strongly about for yourself.  Don't put down 'I will attend church regularly' if you don't feel the conviction.  You'll never stick with it and you're already setting yourself up to fail.  Put things, events, and experiences on this list that resonate within your own spirit.  Something that seems so trivial like skating - for me - if I finally learned to skate really well - it would be a spiritual experience.

And please don't put on this list - a bunch of stuff about being healthier and losing weight.  It's been done.  By you, by everyone...to no victorious end.  Perhaps instead of listing 'cut back on sweets'  - say something like 'eat more mangos'.  Some amazingly yummy fruit or veggie that you enjoy - some type of food that is so good for you - make a goal to eat more of that.  Do you actually enjoy salads?  Just put down that you are going to eat more salads.  Stop concentrating on what you are going to cut out of your life.  Study more on what you will add to it.

~Stop concentrating on what you are going to cut out of your life.  Study more on what you will add to it.~

We have to break this insane cycle of torture.  No more deprivation.  Concentrate on the good and create your life list.  Whether you believe in the divine or not - a life list or bucket list is just a collection of experiences you would like in your life before you pass from this world.  And writing them down keeps them in the forefront of your conscious as well as your subconscious mind. 

For those who think more along the spiritual lines - writing these down and feeling the excitement in your spirit as you write them - sends the request out to the universe and the universe is set in motion to respond with what you have asked for.

Be happy and filled with hope, cheer, and love.  Be victorious!  Happy Holidays to you and yours!

Love & Gratitude,

Erica Nicole

Someday One of These Posts Will Be Called: Dreamz....Achieved

Happy Tuesday!  The web address is now hosted!  WOOOOO HOOOO! 

Now hold back some excitement.  I haven't actually put anything on it.  You know how it goes - I'll make that lovely front page with the 'Under Construction' message in some form or another.  And will be working on the rest of the content all secretly.  I have gone through several design ops in my head, but when I actually get to it, it always changes a bit.

My next steps are

(1).  Cleaning out my email accounts so they can all be forwarded to one account smoothly and easily
(2).  Outlining my PHP texts and figuring how what code I need to use to make this vision work.

I realize I have been talking about figuring out this code for a while now.  It isn't the code that is hard to figure out - it's the fact that this is all original IP (intellectual property) from me.  So it's not like I can just use someone's model.  I have to piece this stuff together and I don't know what that is going to entail just yet.  I haven't gotten that far.  But...I seem to be at that point now lol.  No more saying 'I'm gonna'.  It's do or die at this point ;-)

Now as for giving another more revealing hint as to what this site is all about......  The work I am doing currently is about our happiness.  I feel that happiness is as complicated or as simple as we tend to make it at the time.  Will this be a cure all?  A website that will solve all life's complications?  Of course not.  But if it helps point people in the right direction...toward their goals and dreams - then it is life-changing.  It is meaningful.  And as the cliche goes, if it helps one person - then it's all worth it. 

The most I can give right now is that this site addresses every aspect of our happiness by keeping things small, simple, and direct.  At first glance, it may just seem like a web toy.  And it is fun.  It has to be...or you wouldn't be happy using it.
I realize it is still all a bit cryptic, but this is more than I have revealed before and many of my closest friends and relatives still do not know all the details.

I was always scared of starting anything and following through with my many plans and ideas because I knew there just had to be someone out there who either had already done it or would do it better than me.  But this one...well I realized that even though there may be something out there that is similar...no one will do it just like me.  Which is essentially, the only thing that makes us all useful - our differences.

Okay - enough babbling - I have to get back to work.

Love & Gratitude,
Erica Nicole

I'm Baaaaaack!

New schedule.  New posts every Tuesday.  Yeah I'm actually getting organized!  Who'da thunk it. 

As I said in the last post, my rpg's are taking over my life and even though I do not wish to give them up, I have found a happy medium where I only get on vent (vent = phone for the computer - to talk to other guildies) only when we raid (raid is a large party of guildies or fellow players united to take on a common goal in game).  So I set status to busy and concentrate on the task or tasks at hand whether in game or out.

So far it has worked very well in game with my being able to concentrate solely on leveling and within a few hours I hit the new top level for the game. 


So now I can concentrate on the out of game items.  I finished my Christmas list and have done the majority of the shopping with just a few items to take care of here in the next couple days.

As for work on the site, in next week's post I will mention what the site is all about without revealing the mechanics so that it is unstealable, but less mysterious and more tangible to all reading this blog.

Someday I'll really work on advertising....but I figure this blog isn't that interesting right now.  It is a working journal to keep myself sane and to let others know what I'm up to and why I haven't been available as much.  I still love you all!  ;-)

Love & Gratitude,
Erica Nicole

Blood Elves and Deadlines

One would think having a husband that travels and no family to tend to, I'd have all the time in the world to work.  But the loneliness and boredom of the day seeps in and I find solace in my escapes like computer games and endless lists of things to do (items that rarely get checked off - just rearranged and re-worded).  The day slips away before I know it.  And yet another day gone in the life of Erica Graham.  One I'll never get back.  December 2, 2010 will never take place again.  And what have I done with this day?

I miss my family and friends and being in a town that is neither city nor country bugs the heck out of me.  In the heart of a major city, there is hustle and bustle.  You can walk to your destination or hail a cab.  There is always something open and people around. 

In the country you have fresh air and privacy.  You can make whatever noise you want or mess for that matter as visitors are rare and neighbors are few.  Scenery that is majestic and not made by man. 

In a town that is in between - you fight traffic to get where you are going.  Cabs don't drive down on cul-de-sacs very often and walking across an interstate to get where you want to go probably is not the best idea.
The houses are so close together in the suburbs, they may as well be apartments and yet the housing developers plan and build them to make you think you have your own yard.  Oh you're free to do and build and be whatever you want.  Until the homeowner's association steps in telling you what to do and how to do it.  You can build a fence in your own yard - but it can't be over 4 feet high unless you have a pool.  It must be white with one little pink doggy stenciled on the eastern most post.  Okay I made that last part up but seriously I sit and wonder - who is paying for this fence anyway?  If they're going to regulate it all - how about they chip in a bit?  Least they could do.

I most definitely feel imprisoned.  I am bored with human life.  Thus my escape to a world filled with epic gear and elves.  If only World of Warcraft were the norm.  If only all you had to do was run back to your body if you accidentally fall off a cliff.  You resurrect with half health of course, but a quick potion or bandage and you're good as new. 

There are voices in my head...it is the people I play this game with.  There is a software program called Ventrilo that allows my fellow WoW players to truly converse with each other.  I seem to live my life over such devices as of late.  Phone calls, vent, toon emotes - all the same.  I can't decide if that's a bad thing or not.  Oh many who have never played would say its very bad and not healthy.  But it cuts down on the small talk and awkwardness of meeting in person.  I hate small talk.  How many answers are there to how are you doing and what have you been up to?  Next time I'm going to tell them I killed 50 whelplings in 15 seconds and my last name is now Jenkins.

As one person said in 'trade chat' in the middle of a crowded city:  "Girlfriend?  Who needs a girlfriend?  Girlfriends come and go, but epic gear binds on equip."  Oh wait...that probably wasn't as funny to nonplayers.  I forget about civilians sometimes.  This game will get into your soul and then you are bound to it - both in speech and dreams. 

When I start to spin around as I jump and thrust my hand forward expecting arcane missiles to shoot out, I'll know it is time to seek serious help. 

Til then, you can find me on WoW.  And I wrote all that to say this:  Cataclysm, the new expansion is coming out in less than a week.  This sets the game world on a tizzy as people prep their characters to take on the new content.  If you watch that vid - be not afraid.  My guild and I are on top of it - we'll kill Deathwing and save the world....of warcraft. I'm setting aside the PHP book for a few days.  It's my own vacation because at this point - holidays don't count.  They are so hectic - they feel like work now.  The baking, the decorating, the traveling, the shopping...bleck.  Family face time is definitely worth it - but still hectic.
I am very happy things are falling into place with every project I currently have going. 

There are just those moments I begin to doubt or want things done a little faster and a lot better.  And while those things are not bad to want, breaks and vacations can do a world of good.  As long as I stick to my schedule after this week's vacation - everything is still smooth sailing. 

Love & Gratitude,
Erica Nicole